Help Your Child Learn From Her Mistakes

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Help Your Child Learn From Her Mistakes
- by Alvin Poh
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Everyone make mistakes. It is a part of life. We have to
accept that we're not perfect because we are only human
and we will continue to make mistakes for the rest of our life.

In fact, if we do not make mistakes, much of our learning
simply wouldn't take place.

The ability to understand their mistakes and to forgive
themselves is something children need to learn. The proper
ways of coping with mistake and the ability to learn from
them is something that can be cultivated when children are
still young. And parental understanding and support are vital
elements in this process.

Children need to understand that making mistakes is part of
their life and it does not make them a failure. It is how they
cope with their mistakes and what they learn from the
experience that is important.

And children learn by observing what adults do, especially
the people closest to them, their parents. Parents have a
very powerful influence in their children's life.

Hence if you make a mistake in front of your child, the best
thing you can do is admit to it. If you follow up with a quick
discussion on where you went wrong and suggest a more
appropriate course of action together with what you learnt
from your mistake, then you are being a good role model for
your child.

If you have a relationship with your child in which she admits
her mistakes openly and frankly, then you are on the right
track.

Admitting to one's mistakes is a pretty hard work for many
people. It often takes a fair amount of personal courage
and strength to do this. For your child to be able to take this
step, she must feel secure and confident in herself and she
must be able to trust you. The way you see and handle your
child's mistakes, starting when she is very young, will have a
very crucial impact on the way she handles her mistakes in
the future.

Never make your child feel small for her mistakes or punish
her for mistakes that she makes. Doing so will do more harm
than good to the foundation of trust and security your child
has in the relationship between you and her. In fact, her
insecurity and fear to this kind of response can lead to your
child covering up or denying her mistakes, rather than
wanting to discuss them with you and learn from the
experience.

Instead. focus on helping your child realizing where she went
wrong and what she can do the next time to make things
better. Encourage your child to admit that she has done
something wrong and commend her for her honesty when
she does. If punishment is necessary, make sure she
understands why and the seriousness of the situation so
that she will learn from the mistakes.

We can all help our children learn from their experience and
ultimately become a much better person in life.